I lost someone very special to me. I know my flaws, i really do. I feel like nothing now. I'm the biggest flirt I know. and its not that I want these guys. I just find something nice to say about everyone. I always made you feel wanted right? But I didn't get that from you. It was like you were just going through the emotions. You were so cold sometimes. I feel alone. All I want is to feel wanted, and loved, and appreciated. Pick up the phone and call me, text me whatever! Just let me know you care. You were the first person I thought about when I woke up, and the last person I thought about when I went to sleep. Hopeless. Didn't I love you enough? wasn't my touch soft enough? I want to be angry with you. I know its weird, but how else do you mend a broken heart? How do you let go of those feelings of hopefullness for a better tomorrow with the one I loved. Damnit I Loved you! Why the fuck didn't you love me!? *exhales* Bullshit! if you loved me we would still be together! Why aren't you here? why am I alone? why do i still love you??
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Today... I feel kind of...lonely.
You know that lonely you feel when you think of someone you really like?
Yeah, that kind of lonely.
The lonely you know would go away if they would just look your way. "Hey..." you would say, "...how are you?", they would look you in your eyes and say "i'm better now". LOL you would do.
Writing this makes me lonely.
"Lonelyyy, Mister lonelyyyyy, I have no bodyyyy..."
Is the song that plays in my head. Almost like my mind is saying. Ah Ha, youuu suck! :P.
Its not everyday I feel this way.
I swear its not.
Just when he's not around.
..Hey..here he comes
......."How are you"
......." I'm cool"
.......there he goes....
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Monday, August 18, 2008
Fonzworth Bentley, born Derek Watkins, is a hip hop artist, entertainer, and Fashion Designer, best known for being a personal assistant to P. Diddy. He is currently the host of the MTV's reality show From G's to Gents.
I have admired this Man of Monday for quite sometime now.
His style, his demeanor, his looks, ahhh his everything! Girls get
Saturday, August 16, 2008
I have are really good sense of humor. Love depresses me sometimes. I question my motives at times,
I believe myself to be a very genuine person, I just can be a little selfish when it comes to my wants. I have this unbelievable love towards everyone, I'm kinda Godly in that manner(is that blasphemy?). I'm very blunt when its needed. I stick up for the little guy at all cost. People underestimate me a lot, which is kind of sad I guess. I sometimes have image issues. I get used a lot by my 'friends', I would resent them for it, but deep inside I know it validates me. I don't have the ability to hide or mask my emotions. I very approachable. In my head the world revolves around me. Its kind of like the Truman show, I don't think I'm the only person who feels this way tho. I cry at movies. I want to be friends with everyone, but I don't think everyone wants to be friends with me. I'm not the most popular guy around, I don't have a thousand or so friends on myspace or any other site for that matter, but every person I come into contact with matters to me. Some days it might not seem that way, I do have bad days. I survived a tumor, yay me. I hate it when ppl worry, which is why I tend to carry a lot of heavy heavy issues on my own. I make it tho. Glory to God. OMG I love music! Brandy is my fav, I like Beyonce too, So please no shade Beyonce fans. lol. R&B and Neo-soul are what I mostly get into. I have a pretty good singing voice, I also enjoy acting. I use to be a club person, now i'm pretty much a home body. I sometime can be a porn addict lol, I'm seeing someone about that tho. :D,